Oatmeal Creme Pies

I love oatmeal creme pies. I can eat an entire box in one sitting, and have found that they work equally well for breakfast, lunch, dinner, or anything in between. If I take my hourly wage, subtract tithing and taxes, divide by the cost of one box of Oatmeal Creme Pies, and multiply by the number of pies per box, then that means that I can eat 84 oatmeal creme pies per hour 8 hours a day. Since most human beings work 8 hours a day, sleep 8 hours a day, and dink around the other 8 hours, every 42.9 seconds during my dinking-off hours I can consume one pie. Setting a timer to go off every 42 seconds would make life simple while saving 10 pies per day from the extra 0.9 seconds every minute. These surplus pies I would save and in about two years time would have enough Oatmeal Creme Pies for a year's supply of food. Face it, would you rather eat wheat or Oatmeal Creme Pies when the world goes kaplooey? These things will last forever.