Response to Daily Universe Opinion: "Unrighteous Hordes"

In a letter last week to the editor of the Daily Universe (BYU's Student Newspaper) a student wrote the following:

Letter: Unrighteous Hordes

Wed 03/17/2010

Sadly, I was unable to attend this Tuesday’s devotional (for very personal reasons). I am a regular attendee of Tuesday devotionals and forums and was horrified to discover I am part of a startlingly small minority of students that actually attend, even though a healthy majority patently should. When I had to miss last Tuesday’s devotional, I happened to be passing through the library where I observed literally hordes of students busily placing academic duties above religious ones. What’s worse, I observed many students simply napping, playing games or checking Facebook. To place school over spirituality is bad enough, but to bypass a weekly walk down the straight and narrow for an idle stroll though Babylon is an abhorrent waste of the tithing dollars used to subsidize the tuition of transgressors. A call to action is in order.

To devotional goers: Be aware! As a proportion of the studentbody, there are less of us than you probably assume. Encourage those around you to stand a little taller. We are our brother’s keepers.

To devotional sluffers: Be advised! Tuesday morning complacency is a recipe for disaster.

To the administration: Be aggressive! Stand up to this deplorable development by proactively taking measures to stem its source. Close the library for the devotional hour, or at least power down all the computers.

We can be better, BYU. And we would already know that if we were all in the Marriott Center every Tuesday.

Brett Myers
Orland, Calif.

I loved it! So much so that I sent in a response. Here it is, I will post a link to the published letter if and when it gets published.

Letter: Mind Your Own Business

In response to “Unrighteous Hordes”: It is fitting that you should throw the first stone, seeing as you are a “regular attendee of Tuesday devotionals.” Pray tell, what were the “very personal” reasons you referenced in your letter? If I am to be your keeper, as you propose, then I will decide if your absenteeism was warranted or not.

Nevertheless, as one of the healthy majority of subsidized transgressors, I’m grateful for saints like yourself who descend from the realms of perfection to pass through the library of sin and affliction.

It’s people like you, who faithfully warn of the woes of devotional delinquency, that keep people like me on the straight and narrow. May we always revere those who make our business theirs for the sake of righteousness.

Ahem. Excuse me. I couldn’t quite tell if your letter was sarcastic. Is mine a little more clear?

From the words of an early Mormon creed, “Mind your own business.”

Nicholas Herrick

Linville, Virginia

Impress Your Date, Provo Style

I laughed so hard when I saw this, I just had to memorialize it here. Welcome to Provo.

see more Epic Fails

Weird Physics Units

First prize in Nick's Weird Physics Units contest goes to:

fb⁻¹

The Inverse Femtobarn!

The "inverse femtobarn" (fb⁻¹) is a measurement of particle collision events per femtobarn. Inverse femtobarns are often quoted as an indication of particle collider effectiveness.

It took Fermilab over a decade to achieve 1 fb⁻¹.

A close second was the shed, which is equal to 10⁻²⁴ barns or 3.86 x 10⁻⁵⁸ square miles.
Third place goes to the einstein, which is a mole of photons (6.022 x 10²³ photons) .
Honorable mentions go to the henry, zeptoweber, and of course, snap, crackle, and pop.